Dreams Are All We Have

It pains me to see you like this. It hurts to know that I can't be there to aid you or help you go through this pain. If anything I would like to do in this world, that would be to comfort you no matter what. It is more important to see the happiness in another than yourself, that's my motto. I wish that I would be able to just make you feel better, the ability that when you see my your pain goes away because that how you make me feel. You take away all the eyes that are looking down upon me. I do understand times can be rough, times can be hard, but just imagine how times would be like when we are together. Time when we are able to yell at each other and be cranky of our old age. Times where we don't need to worry about time left, but rather how to spend the remain time happy (if that makes any sense). Time where we are free to enduge in the pleasures of life. That is what my dream is to be able to be with you forever. If all we have are dream, and if this is all I have, and if you sad. Then I guess I have nothing....

soaring

All I want to do is "just fly away".

The ability to be able to leave any situation, the ability of being able to just "fly" but rather than run. Because when one runs they are only hiding still staying on the same surface unable to achieve greatness. Rather than the ability to fly, where one is able to fly anywhere, anyplace or even anytime they choose.

Why do I want to fly, I want to fly because I want understand my past better to be able to finally understand who I really am.

As of recently, I have just discovered that it wasn't my mom who wanted to leave but my grandma who wanted my mom to leave of the reason of that she never took care of me and cared more about her family in china. Why am I ranting, because I need to unleash all these bottled up feeling. Wher at one point I'll be see free from my past and purist my greatness or "happyness"

But all I want is just for these feelings to go away because they are the reason why I've been set back so much.

So listen to these beatboys and free my soul. All I want is to rock and roll and drift away.

Away to a place of haven...

Forgive and Forget?

Is it possible to forgive and forget?

I personally dont believe it is. Maybe its just me rant just a bit, but ehh. I mean i understand the forgive part because people dont tend to hold grudges all of their life, even the girl in the grudge let goes of her (or at least from what i remember). But is it possible to forget? Since what ever happened makes you who you are, how would one be able to forget something? the capability of forgetting would be contradicting the ideal of forgive, because its impossible to forget something when it never happened or you never forgave it.

Well anyways to recap today? It was pretty awesome, even though i have a feeling that amy's parents hate me, and i think jessie too. But ehh, what can i say? I guess i dont make good first impressions and i think jessie is just taking anger out on me. right now i'm reading amy's speech thing, and it helps because it makes me realize what i have infront of me, and how i shouldn't take her for granted. beacuse she is truly awesome, by making everyone happy and just want to tell her that she has saved me. and i truly thank her. And i just want to tell her thank you.


Bloggie i hope everything with her is alright, maybe you can fluff her pillow at night so she can get a good night sleep. and maybe come early for kc meeting, and if you can ask your friend "dream" to give her a good one tonight. you might ask me why?, its because i love her, so take care of her tonight? na wait everynight?


-Fluff those pillows.

Forever?

Dear Bloggie.

It has finally come across to me, that i've begun to question friendship. The thought of the year ending coming to an end, has began the recalling of the year, the memories and the love. With all of this in mind, it also brings on the on coming summer, where friendships die down and things just become a thing in the past.

Somethings have been bugging me. such as how people can really instigate on how friendship last for ever, but how can that be true? its like stating that flowers (metaphorical friendship) can last forever without the proper care and really just care.

It makes me question on what the future brings. *sigh* maybe its just the heat thats getting to me. But all i know is that i really can wait for the summer to come, it might be out of the ordinary. but to be honest, i rather have school and friends then no school and no one. maybe this is why i have affection towards school, and some what look forward to what it brings. maybe this is the true side of me, the side that only you get to see bloggie, because no one ever takes the effort to get to know people anymore.

:[June]:

So it begins. The crazy hectic month of regents/hanging out and sweaty nasty work. Ah I can smell the oil right now.

But in all gravity. i'm currently worried that if i'll be able to mange my time. But screw that its not a post about all the bad things, but rather about the single good thing in my life right now HER. Bloggie, she's so awesome, i'd love for you to meet her one day. Even you would jump out of the computer screen just to get a closer look at her, just because she's so god damm beautiful. I miss her, bloggie. i hate work it tears up apart. But i have to do it. To prove something and to get ready for the college life? Only 26 days left of offical school, but really only 2 more weeks till regents. Am i ready for this changelle.

Well to tell you the true, i'm scared and nervous of what the future hold in front of me. but i know i can get through it as long as shes holding my hand saving me.

So June, come at me with full blast.
and plus get warmer so i can see her in short shorts :] <3

ugh. bloogie this makes me sad. i have to sleep soon, that means time to pretend to dream, because i already have everything i ever wanted in her.


oh.three.two.six.oh.eight. >3

Sorry Bloggie

Sorry I've mistreated you.
Bloggie i've found her. she means the world to me, and maybe i can show her the world, too, one day. I love her. <3
3 26 08

Dear Bloggie.

Please Just Shut The Fuck Up.

Gone. Will I Ever Come Back? Probably Not. So Farewell.